Morning Prayer 3

In this series of blogs, I thought I would share some explanations about the Morning prayer by Jo Getzinger, my prayer minister.  Some of you have asked questions about these prayers, so I will take it paragraph by paragraph.  Some of it might seem obvious, but I think this can be helpful for all of us.  If you’d like to see the full prayer you can go to www.Care1.org or purchase Prayer Warriors from Amazon. 

This is the next paragraph:

“I relinquish the right to decide for myself what I can handle today, and instead I trust You not to overwhelm me.  According to my joy capacity, which You are daily building in me, bring memories and information to me at the pace for which You know I am ready.  Please remove all demonic out of the memories and do not allow them to enhance or to use traumatic memories to accomplish their agendas.”

This first sentence always gets me!  I am giving up my right to decide what I can handle and I trust You!  Those are some of the hardest words for survivors who are used to self-protecting to survive and who struggle to trust anyone, especially God.  Where was He when all this happened?  How come He let this happen?  Why didn’t He stop it?  Now you want me to trust You?  It is not easy to let go of control.  I used to think that control was such an awful thing but as I came to know my journey more, I realized that I always tried to be in control in subtle ways through people-pleasing.  It meant letting go of “me”, but it was worth it to “keep the peace,” i.e. survive.  I understand now that the things that helped me survive back then are keeping me from being authentically myself and who God created me to be. 

Trusting True FAMILY to bring memories and information at the pace They know I am ready is another step.  What if I want it all now?  Sadly, I have learned the hard way that it IS much better to trust Them and Their timing.  There were times I want to “figure it all out” and triggered myself and got into trouble.  There is so much more peace trusting in God than to try to do it ourselves. 

What about you?  Are you willing to trust True FAMILY with your memories?  How about what you can handle today?  I invite you into this process.  I would love to hear about it!  Comment below!